what happens when the thing you used to retreat to becomes the thing you have to retreat from .. ?

it’s the horrifying possibilities raised by that exact question that made me determined to not study music.. something that’s so central to my identity – i don’t think i could bear being told how to do it , what to do / not do..

anyway, i think – given film’s slightly further removed location from the core of my being, i can possibly just about handle some formal education.. but i fear the curse of the formula. rules and creativity don’t mix too well for me..

a formula is a useful thing for getting somewhere; navigating your way around it, finding your way safely out – it satisfies that innate human need to tidy, to box, to chart, to make sense of the unknown – ultimately to bring order to chaos .. and there is definitely a place for all that .. maps, laws of physics, microwave pasta instructions..

but in the context of creativity – i firmly believe the formula is evil and restrictive:

  • it assumes a common identity, that what has worked for one will work for all –
  • it suppresses individuality and encourages stagnant, robotic, lifeless crap ..
  • it attempts to quantify the immeasurable.. success is relative and subjective, yet the formula says otherwise
  • it forsakes the scenery, carves a dual carriageway through the infinite and encourages us to use it ..
  • it says “no” to “yes